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Description
EVEN IF I'M NOTMy first words as a mother were, "Dont drop him. It was as if I knew, even before I held my first child, that I wouldnt be able to hold onto my children. \n \nWe were the family who lost half our children; over a ten year period, four of our eight children died, as infants, from a rare mitochondrial disorder. After the babies died, I was sure that nothing terrible could happen to us ever again. \n \n \nNot to us. \n \n \nThen, Yossi, our oldest child
My first words as a mother were, "Don’t drop him.” It was as if I knew, even before I held my first child, that I wouldn’t be able to hold onto my children.
\n
\nWe were the family who lost half our children; over a ten-year period, four of our eight children died, as infants, from a rare mitochondrial disorder. After the babies died, I was sure that nothing terrible could happen to us ever again.
\n
\n
\nNot to us.
\n
\n
\nThen, Yossi, our oldest child and only son, drowned six weeks before his wedding day.
\n
\n
\nAs a child, Yossi loved playing with words. Once, when he was getting ready for school, I said to him, "There are bagels on the counter if you’re hungry.”
\n
\n
\nHe said, "Even if I’m not.”
\n
\n
\n"What?”
\n
\n
\n"The bagels are on the counter even if I’m not hungry.”
\n
\n
\nAfter Yossi died, I grappled with long-held beliefs: Hashem is close; everything that happens has a purpose; and our neshamos continue to exist after we leave This World. The comfort of these truths was there for me, if I was ready to accept it, but also—as I learned—"even if I’m not”…
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\nAt first, I couldn’t find my way forward. I felt like Hashem was saying, I’m asking you to do something impossible. Do it anyway.
\nEven If I’m Not is the story of doing the impossible.
\n
\nBy Devorie Kreiman
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4.4 ★★★★★
Based on 8 reviews
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Product Reviews
★★★★★ 5
Soft and easy to lift
My grand daughter loves Elmo
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Reviewed in the United States on April 5, 2026
★★★★★ 5
Worth Every Penny
My son loves Elmo so I purchased him this blanky. He absolutely loves it! I’ve washed it so many times and it still looks great! I know it’s on the pricey side but totally worth it!
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Reviewed in the United States on November 30, 2025
★★★★★ 4
Great quality
Super cute to add to a gift.
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Reviewed in the United States on May 19, 2026
★★★★★ 5
Elmore is a timeless delight for babies
My Great granddaughter loves this!
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Reviewed in the United States on January 23, 2026
★★★★★ 5
Elmo Blankey
My little man took to this when he was 3 months old, so glad we could find a spare just in case! Size is good for a personally little carry around blankey. It’s durable, soft and a good price for what it is
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Reviewed in the United States on February 24, 2026